The Secret Art to Long Distance Relationships

Hi guys. Last night I was at a bar drinking with a friend, who is currently in the crappy situation of missing his girlfriend. She’s had to go abroad for work and he’s really struggling, being new to the whole long distance thing. So today’s post is all about that topic and includes the advice I gave my buddy.    

There comes a time in a relationship when distance becomes the biggest obstacle—whether it’s caused by a sudden career opportunity abroad, a business venture that need to be looked upon overseas, or simply a personal choice made to better a current situation—long distance relationships are indeed a challenging obstacle to overcome.

Distance is your enemy, obviously. Yet space and time can act as your friends, because these two will enable your relationship to grow. When played right, time and space can contribute to a lasting relationship, and can only make the both of you stronger for each other, even if you are separated by oceans.

Long distance relationships, when looked from a typical perspective, are challenging, frustrating, and emotional. The longing and loneliness one may experience when being apart from a loved one is all common, and sometimes it leads to worry, a sense of mistrust, and the total fallout of a relationship.

There are a lot of ways to keep your relationship alive even if you are miles apart from each other. Sure, there will always be sad times, but think of the long-term—once you’ve hurdled such a hard commitment, you’ll know that your relationship has withstood the test of time and distance.

There are three keys to working it out, and trust me on these, I’m speaking from experience. Along time ago, me and a girl were separated by miles, and this is what that experience taught me.

Okay, number one: be clear from the get go. It’s important for the both of you to know what’s the real deal—are the two of you dating? Are you exclusively seeing each other? Are you agreeing on an open relationship? Are you officially boyfriend and girlfriend? Though putting labels on relationships isn’t always recommended, it would greatly help in making a long distance relationship work. This allows clear objectives, the right to demand or to expect(when the two of you are exclusively together), or set limitations and expectations.

Once you’ve sorted out step one, step two is pretty easy. Communicate, Communicate, Communicate.

This is where it gets tricky—you don’t see each other, so having physical interaction is impossible. This is really frustrating, but remember—this will allow you to communicate better. Communication is always key, and for long distance couples, it IS required. Voice calls, chat, emails, or phone calls are necessary to keep your relationship alive. Make Skype a shrine for allowing the both of you to talk as much as you can.

Finally, and this is where most long distance relationships falter—the inability to think ahead and plan for a future. Think forward and plan ahead. A long distance relationship requires trust, commitment, and patience—and it takes a great deal of an emotional investment to be in one. Time is important, and you both don’t want to waste time. If you are serious with each other, plan ahead. Think of the future as your ally—as long as it’s there, you’d be sure that the two of you would have something to look forward to each and every day, even if when the two of you are apart.

For other dating tips, feel free to go around my blog or visit for more detailed info. Be sure to sign up for my new book;


My Thoughts On Love, Life & Relationships – A Self Reflection

I have recently emerged from a 10-year relationship with an ex-girlfriend. It was painful, but my love life was in tatters. I thought I had completely mastered the art of picking up women but evidently I still had lots to learn. Bummer.

Listening to George Michael’s “Spinning The Wheel” did not help. It made me miss my girlfriend even more. Word of advice: if you have got a loving relationship then treasure it – and give it everything you’ve got. Don’t take your chances and spin the wheel.

Desperate, I went on a “knowledge binge” and started to download seduction programs by dating gurus like Tyler Durden (Real Social Dynamics), Neil Strauss, Derek Rake and Paul Janka. I found the online seduction community. I was like a kid in the candy store. There was a wealth of seduction knowledge which was pretty awesome. I quickly absorbed all the techniques that have purportedly originated from sophisticated mind control, hypnosis and advanced persuasion. There are some techniques like the dreaded “October Man Routine” which are reputed to make women fall in love with less than an hour. I was super excited!

My Seduction Mistakes – Don’t Fall Into The Same Trap

I came to realize that seduction techniques are inherently manipulative. Despite what seduction gurus want you to understand, what you are doing when you use seduction techniques to pick up women is that you exploit the loophole in female psychology that makes them vulnerable to your advances.

They say all is fair in love and war. I needed to get my ex-girlfriend back at all costs… and I immersed myself in seduction techniques found online

It’s not something I am proud of. But then again I was super jealous of my ex-girlfriend’s new boyfriend that I would do anything to gain an edge. I stumbled upon this webpage: –

Light bulbs immediately came up! When combined with meditation technology I was unstoppable when it comes to seducing my ex-girlfriend back. I was sure.

Most importantly, I realized the importance of being who I am – there is no point putting up a fake front and try to make women fall in love with me. I gotta present my true self and not be a faker.

Finally I have ditched the idea of becoming a pickup artist – that is super lame despite what a site like or even want me to believe. I will live life on my own terms!

– TJ