TJ's Dating Hub

TJ's Guide to the Second Date

What about second dates???

A lot of men believe that their biggest AND only mission in the dating scene is to secure a first date and make a good impression. NOT! What men fail to see is women are a good giver of second chances. Even if you failed to impress them 100% the first time, if they see you have a great potential, they give you the second date to make it or break it.

The problem with most men is that they become complacent after securing a first date, thinking they did so perfectly on the first one and women are dying to meet you a second time around. Think again! For some women, the first one is the eliminations, and the second one is either the semi-finals or the wild card. Always put your best foot forward brother!

second dates

The factors that make up a successful second date are almost similar to the first one, but really, even when you’re on wild card, you’re always a step closer. You had the first date advantage after all.

If you want to make it out of your second date alive at the very least, and succeed to a third date, check out my list of do’s and don’ts on your second date:

What to do?

  • Look and smell better. Sure you looked great on the first one, but why don’t you step it up a notch? Maybe change your hairstyle a little bit? Or wear a really clean-smelling after shave and deodorant that will make her notice you. If you're unsure of what would look better on you, stick to white. Always works. If women has this "little blak dress" as a fashion staple, ours is a basic white shirt. Ask your female pals to confirm!

  • Remember everything you did and said on the first date. Guys who have numerous first dates in a week will have a hard time achieving this. Girls like men who remember, who focus on, and who listen to them. If you can remember what she said, so much better. If you bring it up, you’re going to make her blush inside.

  • Bring her something. A little bouquet won’t hurt. In fact, flowers are your perfect choice for gifts. It’s not too grand but they still are lovely..

  • flowers for her

  • Be more comfortable. You’ve met her before, you’ve gone out before - you are not strangers anymore. Keep your jitters in control. Being too nervous will distract you and make you lose focus on the conversation and will make her think you are not interested. Don’t think too much about what to say or what to do and enjoy her company. Trust me, it will show.

  • Come on time. Whether you decide to pick her up or meet up somewhere, a late date is never a good one. Gentlemen never keep the ladies waiting.

What NOT to Do:

  • Be too relaxed. Okay so I said be comfortable but that does not mean you’d be too cozy as to forget your manners or say something nonsensical!

  • Talk about your ex or some other girl. Women are naturally selfish when it comes to their men and boy, they hate competition! That's an understatement. It’s a turn off if you talk about your ex or worse, talk about how hot your new officemate is.

  • Brag and be cocky. There’s a fine line that separates the confident men from the jerky bragging boys. Stepping up does not mean telling her how she would be so much better with a macho guy like you or how you date three girls in one night..

  • Go home without asking her out another time. If you really, really loved her company and you really, really want to see her again, cap off the night with ‘So, can I see you again some other time?’ This will also give you a chance to gauge whether or not you did well or not. After all, a vague answer is almost as good as a negative answer.

Don't Take Second Dates for Granted

Just like second chances, it is a time of redemption guys. If you think you've messed up during the first date, this is the perfect time to make up. If you were able to do good on your second date, then you'll have no problem booking for a third. But before you go into your third date, read this now to secure you a homerun.

-TJ